you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize