Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
