wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
