hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
