Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
