i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
