We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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