I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
