If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
