No, you can still breathe under the balls.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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