I like to think it a success when the cops are called
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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