so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize
