We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize