i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
