Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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