from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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