If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
