All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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