And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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