after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Verdict: uncircumcised.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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