no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
