This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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