I would go down on you faster than GM stock
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Randomize