I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
