he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize