omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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