i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
