Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
