dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize