Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Randomize
