Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
fuck your aforementioned shoe
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
