I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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