Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
where are you?
Hypothermia
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
