I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
