i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
PANTIES FOUND
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