I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize