I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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