I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Everclear isn't food dammit
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
