I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
