i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize