If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
