Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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