Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
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