quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
