Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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