he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
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