You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
