On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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