someone threw a dead crab at me
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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