just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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